Viewer Discretion Advised.

If we do in fact believe that the home page of ANY website across the World Wide Web is the most important page of all, then how come the peanut gallery still attempts to assert its antithesis? In this evening’s blog post, we’re going to take a peek at some of the worst home pages ever known to (wo)mankind, many of which appear to be hand-drawn by a three-year-old with watercolor paints.

What Not To Do: Bore and Beseech your Audience

First up on our naughty list is the finger-painting masterpiece of high school sports in Mississippi.


Absolutely atrocious: the icon is wholeheartedly pixelated and can only be amended when the viewer zoom is set to 25%; the displayed gallery of shifting photographs is even more pixelated and stretched far beyond capacity; the attempt at simplicity with a white-washed background blinds the viewer into an ironic dark void; the unnecessary abuse of typography and color gives too much of the spiritual gusto away; the exhaustive list of unorganized football scores creates a cramped feeling (Or at least a cramped hand.).

Not only are we left with a sense of unprofessional apathy, but we are that much more stoked to see the next football game.

What Not To Do: Blind and Befuddle Your Audience

Next up shot on a black background interlaced with a series of blindingly neon gif icons, this website follows a lede of “Flashing Jewelry, LED Lights, Body Lights, and Blinkies.”


Okay, yes—we get it. You’re attempting to market your product on your website, but must you market your website AS your product? The last time I checked, you don’t have to emulate the insole of a pair of DSW boots in order to sell one (Granted, DSW is a much more successful company than the website being discussed, but its success is irrelevant to the topic at hand.). In fact, modern day companies are straying from what was once the norm of advertisement.

The inundation of constantly flashing lights and moving elements and ALL THE COLORS!! mentality radically discombobulates the reader; and if that’s not enough to induce a digital coma, then try using the user-unfriendly scrollbar that eschews any remaining tolerant viewers (as seen per demonstration in the first few seconds of the struggling user’s experience in the .gif).

Might as well rename it “Blindees” if we’re truly being honest here and attempting to aim for accuracy.


Go ahead and explore these useful links that were referenced throughout the post: